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Friday 20 January 2012

Transformation, or not?

Things change and so do circumstances. Life brings you to this turn which you are forced to take and there is no looking back. A girl with absolutely zero confidence, turns up to the world and takes it in her hands. Yes, its a tough ride, but what is easy in this life? A realisation comes that all the decisions made were wrong, that there still might be a way to go back to that easy beautiful life. But is it right? Confusion is all that pollutes this mind. The biggest question is, for how long? When will it be finally over? That final breath when I can say yes, this is what I wanted. Its not the city, or adjustment or anything. But home. Yes, its home. Why is it the only thought, the most important aim and priority? July is when this roller coaster began, but where is the end stop?


Traveling in an auto in this cold, hardly any visibility, the girl looks out and wonders, "Dreams are these? Have I achieved the crazy goal I pushed myself towards for years?" The mind is crucid, it plays unfair games. Yet, there is the heart which yearns for home, the warmth, the love and the belonging. "But I do get all that here, don't I?" Such questions go unanswered. All that is left to show to this world is a brave face. A face which fakes happiness, satisfaction and most importantly pride. Staring at the traffic passing by, a white car strikes her eye. The scene is common, a father dropping her beloved daughter to some unknown destination, sacrifising his sleep and starting his rough day much before it should've actually begun, just for the love and fear for how will his little princess go where she has to? Yes, it is a very familiar scenario, with the exception that the little princess is no more little. Her daddy let her go and face this cruel world. But has he really accepted the fact that things have changed? That time has transformed her? So many questions, with no answers. Until the girl realised that this day in her life she's traveling alone to college. In this thick fog, which she wouldn't have even dreamt of getting out in if she was home. Have circumstances made her tough? Hell yes. 

Then why do these moments come when it feels that all is for nothing?